Give Yourself: Filling your own tank

What is that thing you want to do that you don’t make the time to do? Maybe you even have the time, but don’t give yourself the permission to do it? What is that thing that you REALLY don’t want to do – but keep doing it out of routine, bad habit and some misplaced sense of obligation. Who do you keep giving to? Why do you think that if you just keep giving – if you just give a little more – they will finally give in and give back?

We’ve all been over-givers to some degree. We do it with our jobs, relationships, children and God knows what else. Over-giving is one bad bad idea. Over-giving is bad because it depletes us. A couple of weeks ago I wrote a little something on The Secret Solo Date: Enjoying Solitude

Unsurprisingly, it resonated more with the extroverts than it did the introverts. Many people think that extroverts are people who love being around others – and we do. But all the ‘best’ extroverts I know were former introverts (myself, included). Sometimes we just need some time to enjoy our solitude. 


I’m blessed that I have friends of all ages, cultures and backgrounds. My social calendar is always full. I also interact with people from all walks of life for work. I love it. I wouldn’t change that for anything. But because of that reason – I desperately need to take time to myself. I need to do something for me and keep it a secret. 

And no matter what – these days I make the time to do that for myself once a week. It’s just so…fulfilling. I love it. I really do. It’s a self-indulgent thing to say – but I actually look forward to spending time with myself. 

Make time to do that thing you want to do. Give yourself permission to enjoy it. Stop doing all the crap you don’t want to do. Forget about giving to others. Give yourself first and then share what’s left. Whenever I enjoy solitude – I’m always in good company. 

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